Props To Go

By Aveline Perez (with thanks to Matt and Larry)

 

Imagine a world sometime in the distant future where juggling is as popular as hamburgers. The demand for props sees the rise of chain stores specialized in providing quick fulfillment of that juggling urge over the counter with uniformity and a smile. On many city corners and out in the suburbs the golden clubs of "MacDubes" brighten the black night, attracting crowds glad of the brightly lit warmth from the cold, and the 24-hour juggling laws.

 

Behind the counter is a young multiple­pierced street-wise kid asks, "Can I like take your order, man?" It's always so hard to choose. Do you want three or five of the rubber chicken nuggets? You know you're not up to seven, maybe you'll go five tonight, as you're here with all your mates. Someone orders the spinning combo - balls, plate and rings. Of course, the mouthstick gets half stuck in the silver dispenser on the bench - no wonder people pull the lid aside and take them out the top! The sign on the bench asks you to think of the environment and only take as many scarves as you need.

 

One of the girls opts for a torch-grilled fire ball, but hold the wick - otherwise it'll end up plastered to the ceiling along with all the other unwanted wicks. As always they do the hard sell, "Do you want fire-water with that?" As if they weren't making a bundle from the franchise already! You decide to juggle in, so the props are handed over to you on a spinning plate. You put your money in the hat. It's important to have the right amount of coins, as they never give change.

 

The special offer this month lets you collect a free site-swap card with each ball and club purchased. A great idea, but somehow you always end up with the boring ones - no-one will want to swap a 51 with you. Last month's deal was better. For only a few cents more you could upsize your stage balls by a half-inch ­great value for those with bigger juggling appetites and hands!

 

Finding a comer of the room's always hard in the middle of the night when these places are mostly frequented by their usual rabble. You have to get in unfashionably early if you want a place with reflection. You wish they'd put in more of the mirror walls. One of the guys laughs and strikes a pose on the park bench next to the seated statue of Ruggle MacJuggle. As if anyone would think this guy, clad in business suit and tie, would really be sitting there in a fast juggle store.

 

You think about the olden days and how different it must have been when they personally made up your clubs for you in the store, and how you had to come back another day to pick them up. Now, they even have ride-through, where you don't even have to get off your unicycle to order and collect your props. Although a lot of people won't admit it, everyone likes fast juggling. However, being health conscious you try not to come here too often. After all, the latest research shows that all that gravity's not good for your psychological health!