by
Garret Mathews
I
recently sent forms to 120 randomly selected members of the IJA and
received 33 responses. Not a real high percentage, but you take
what you can get.
Some
of the questions were fairly straightforward. "Can you
juggle torches?" "Five balls?" "Seven?"
"Did you make any significant money juggling in
1995?" ''Was your mug on television?"
Others
were more off-the-wall "Are there black marks on your
ceiling caused by poorly thrown clubs?" "If your car
breaks down, could you rely on your unicycle to get to work?"
"Can you juggle and see small objects through your bifocals
well enough to keep three pennies aloft for 20 seconds?"
I
probably should explain standard deviation and sampling error, but
I'm not that smart.
"Can
you juggle a bowling ball
and two
objects that aren't?" +Yes -21, No -12.
"I
juggle a bowling ball, an apple and a machete,"
said Matt Zentko. "On the last pass I bite the apple and then
slice it with the machete." Matt is 16-years-old.
"Such
as a machete and a torch? Sure.
Regularly," said Gary Vice of St. Paul, Minn.
"I
do a bowling ball, a beach ball and a pingpong ball," said
Stan Zukowski of Emmaus, Pa.
"It's
fun with a large pumpkin," said
Andrew Adams of Scottsville, NY.
Like
me, do you prefer juggling in front of
children because you feel stupid doing it in front of adults? +Agree
with me - 13, Prefer adult audience - 20.
Did
you earn more than $500 juggling in
1995? +Yes - 11, No - 22.
"Once
I got $30 and a corn dog," said Roger
Oliver of Cherryville, N.C.
Did
you do any street performing in 1995?
+Yes - 6, No - 27.
"In
New York City, you would either have to light yourself or a
building on fire in order to get people to pay attention,"
said Kevin O'Keefe of that city.
Can
you juggle three torches? +Yes - 22,
No - 11.
"I'm
afraid of fire, but my 11-year-old son does it," said Corinne
Ozolins of Martinsville N.J.
"Not
torches, but I've juggled plungers,"
said Randy O'Neil of Battle Creek, Mich.
Are
you proficient enough with a unicycle
that not only can you juggle while riding one, you could use the
thing as a mode of transportation to get to the next subdivision?
+Yes - 11, No -22.
"I
feel as comfortable on the unicycle as I do walking," said
Mike Vondruska of Bensenville, Ill.
Can
you juggle 5 balls? +Yes - 18, No -15.
Can
you juggle 7 balls? +Yes - 5, No 27.
Can
you juggle 5 clubs? +Yes - 6, No - 27.
Have
you ever juggled on television?
+Yes -17, No -16.
"A
high school kid did a 30-minute show on me for a class
project," said Steven Van Dyke of Kansas City, Mo.
If
you were asked to juggle for your local Rotary Club, would you
do it? +Yes - 25, No - 8.
"For
a corn dog I would," Oliver said.
"Would
I have to sing 'Rotary, My Rotary?'"
asked Daniel Amyx of Tampa, Fla.
"The
black marks on my ceiling aren't from
clubs," said Jay Zentko of Peoria, Ill. "It's soot
from practicing fire-eating."
"I
use white clubs, so you can't see the marks," said Abbit the
Average from Irvine, Calif.
"I
made a promise to my parents," O'Neil said. "If I was
allowed to juggle in my room, then I would paint my marks when I
moved out. I had to paint the whole room."
"No
black marks, but I have a broken lamp
in the basement from clubs," Zukowski said.